Guy Reams (00:00.878)
This is day 62, stop being available. For years, I carried a belief that seemed unnoble at the time. Being available 24 seven was proof of my dedication. I thought it said to the world, I'm reliable, I'm indispensable. But as the years have passed, the cracks in that narrative began to show. My time, definitely taken, my dreams neglected, my sense of self-worth,
diminished. If you've ever felt this way, I want to share something that changed my life. Learning to be unavailable can be one of the greatest acts of self-respect you'll ever make. The truth about availability and respect. Here's what I've learned. People value that which has boundaries. They respect clarity.
and they respect you more when you show them that your time and energy are not endless resources to be freely given away. When we say yes to everyone else's priorities, we're simultaneously saying no to our own. Without realizing it, we teach others to overlook our dreams because we've made a habit of overlooking them ourselves. The hard part? This isn't anyone else's doing. It's a lesson we unwittingly taught them.
And unlearning it, that starts with us and only us. Finding freedom through intentionality. Taking back control of your time doesn't happen by accident. It's about making deliberate choices that align with your values. Here's how I started reclaiming my own. Number one, identify what truly matters. Before you can set boundaries, you have to define what you're protecting.
What are the non-negotiables in your life? The habits, routines, commitments that move you closer to the person that you actually want to become. For me, this meant a dedicated morning routine of journaling, planning for my day, and workout. For you, it might be family dinners, creating art, carving out space to dream big, whatever it is. Write these priorities down. Guard them like treasures. They are the anchors that will keep you grounded.
Guy Reams (02:23.073)
Number two, set boundaries with purpose. This step requires courage and clarity. Decide when you're available and for what. Communicate those boundaries honestly with others. Here's what that might sound like. I'm happy to help, but I'm only available during these hours. My mornings are blocked for my personal work. I'll respond to you this afternoon.
I'd love to assist, but I've already committed my time elsewhere. At first, this may feel awkward or even selfish, but trust me, people will adapt, and if they don't, those are the individuals who are likely taking the most from you without giving anything back. Number three, say yes with intention, no without guilt. Every yes is a commitment of your time and your energy.
It's worth asking, does this align with my values? Does it contribute to my goals or bring me joy? If not, then why are you agreeing to it? Saying no is not an act of rejection. It's an act of self-preservation. It's your way of making space for the things that truly matter. Number four, protect what you've built. Once you've carved out time for what matters the most, don't let it slip away.
Believe me, I've built great things only to watch them slip away with my own inaction. Treat it like an unbreakable appointment with your future self. Silence all notifications, shut the door, put on the do not disturb sign, and immerse yourself in the things that inspire and energize you. No one else will defend your time for you. That responsibility rests squarely on your shoulders. And the reward?
A life that feels purposeful and aligned. There's a surprising reward by saying no. You might worry that setting boundaries will push people away. But what actually happens is the opposite. People respect you more.
Guy Reams (04:36.001)
They see someone with a clear sense of direction, someone who values their own life enough to protect it. And the best part, you begin to respect yourself more as well. When you prioritize your goals and commit to life-giving habits, you start showing up as your best self for the things and people that truly matter to you. Instead of being spread thin, you're fully present where it counts. A life on your terms
Reclaiming your time is not selfish, it's necessary. It's about building a life that aligns with your values instead of one that bends to the demands of others. The next time someone asks for your availability, pause. Ask yourself, does this align with my purpose or am I simply keeping busy for someone else's benefit? If it's the latter, give yourself permission to politely decline. Your dreams deserve attention.
Your priorities deserve space, and you deserve a life that reflects your deepest intentions. It all begins with one powerful choice, to honor yourself enough to say no.